The purpose of this book is to compile facts, tips, and stories to inform women about what men want. What they are thinking and feeling. What men would say to women if there was no chance of hurting their feelings or in any way upsetting them.
Men are not all that confusing. They are very simple and do not leave much to be interpreted.
I think that it is safe to say that men and women are not from entirely different planets. I think that all people have similar needs and wants. We simply express ourselves differently and make choices based on both free will and social influences. It just so happens that men and women tend to have entirely different social influences hence the different ways of doing things.
Hey, we are not simple! And we are confusing, that's why you have to write this book ;-).
ReplyDeleteI like to hope and believe that I leave much to be interpreted, but I guess that's what I get from reading too much ancient literature...it goes to your head sometimes.
It isn't so much that I believe men are incapable of complexity, but on the advice side of my book I would like to convey to my readers (young women ages 17-25) that on average men are not playing a lot of mind games or actively trying to confuse women. That when men say "hi" it should not incline a woman to freak out and call a meeting of her girl friends to figure out what he meant. Maybe he likes her, sure, but maybe he was just saying "hi".
ReplyDeleteI've heard it said that men do not usually take the time to think of every single possible consequence of their actions or every underlying meaning of their words. Most guys aren't trying to make you figure them out.
Now I think you pose a good point. Those men who are well studied tend to make comments that women may not understand. That can come more from references to history or literature.
I would suggest that other than casual teasing, men tend to only hide their true intentions if they are afraid of rejection. Men can be very proud, it is hard wired in their biology, bringing from a very young age. Reputation can mean everything to a young man, so why take a chance if there is a good chance of being made to look a fool.
From the observations and answers I've gathered, young men who do not hold a high status in the social hierarchy are more likely to just go up to a girl and ask her out without taking the time to gauge if she is also interested, because they have less to loose. Those young men who are more popular tend to take less risk, assuming they are not likely to be turned down. If and when they are, they are less likely to show that they care, either shrugging it off or going as far as trying to diminish the girl's reputation.